The ultimate master in the city

Chapter 39 Chopsticks

Upon hearing this, Monk Yuanzhi and Zhou Fengchen exchanged a glance, thinking to themselves, "Good heavens, there really is something dirty here!"

Monk Yuanzhi asked, "Amitabha! What happened next? Was the paper burned?"

The old lady wiped away her tears and said, "She had a high fever the night before last, but her stomach is still erect when she eats these past two days. My daughter keeps appearing in my dreams crying at night, but when I ask her what's wrong, she won't say anything."

Monk Yuanzhi paused for a moment, then said, "This humble monk already knows the whole story!"

"Master! What's wrong with her?" The whole family was startled and looked over expectantly. Even Zhou Fengchen looked at Monk Yuanzhi with a blank expression.

"Your daughter was bullied by other ghosts down there, starving and freezing, with nowhere to even stand," Monk Yuanzhi said calmly. "So, she came up to her family for help!"

"What should we do?" the family asked anxiously.

"Amitabha Buddha—" Monk Yuanzhi gave Zhou Fengchen a wink, then closed his eyes and remained silent.

"Amitabha!" Zhou Fengchen didn't know what this guy meant, but he followed suit.

"Uh! I understand!"

The middle-aged man got up and went into the inner room. He quickly brought out a stack of bills and placed them on the table. "Please, gentlemen, have some tea!"

Monk Yuanzhi squinted and glanced at it, then slammed his prayer beads onto the money. "Excellent! Excellent! Go and prepare a live rooster, a roast duck, a plate of pig's head meat, a plate of mushrooms and greens, a dish of shredded potatoes, and a bottle of Erguotou. The two of us will stand up with our chopsticks and pay homage to Heaven, Earth, and the spirits. We will definitely resolve this matter tonight."

Zhou Fengchen was stunned by the charlatan behavior of Monk Yuanzhi. While the family was preparing things, he glanced at the money on the table and asked in a low voice, "Shouldn't we have a specific amount for our rituals? Isn't this random collection disrupting the ritual and making us seem too greedy?"

Monk Yuanzhi shushed him, pulled Zhou Fengchen to the outer corridor, and said, "What specific amount do you need? Why are you so particular about these things! Are you worshipping a founding master?"

Zhou Fengchen blinked. "No, I won't worship him. I'll only worship my father. But my father used to have a clear rule about how much money he would charge each time. If you gave him too much, he would give you change. He would never charge you a penny more. That's called..."

"Stop! If you're not going to worship the patriarch, don't give me that nonsense. This is called a business transaction, understand? People are very pragmatic these days. If you take too little, they might complain that you're offering cheap goods!" Monk Yuanzhi said casually.

"That makes sense!" Zhou Fengchen thought for a moment, then gave a thumbs up, before asking doubtfully, "By the way, was your assessment accurate? Was that girl really starving and destitute?"

Monk Yuanzhi coughed and said, "Nonsense! But it's not far off. There's a lot to learn here. For example, if someone appears in a dream to their family, they must be asking for something. But there are some things they can't say, so they just keep making a fuss. That's when we need to ask a great master, someone like you or me, to solve and guess. We'll find a way to ask them, and once we find out, we can resolve it on the spot."

Zhou Fengchen nodded and said, "I really need to learn from you. I'm too violent when dealing with dirty things; if they don't want to leave, I just kill them!"

Monk Yuanzhi looked embarrassed and said, "If you want to make a living this way, you really need to learn a lot. Violence isn't the key to solving problems. Actually, there are three types of jobs. The simplest is when there's nothing dirty going on; the employer is overthinking it, you just need to put on a show. The next easiest is what we're doing now, called 'delivering.' Whatever their demands, try to meet them and send them away. The most terrifying are evil spirits and beasts that are called 'exorcising.' Exorcising isn't easy; if you're not careful, they might become attached to us and cause us a lot of trouble, like that time in your hometown in the Qinling Mountains. In that case, you can just kill them!"

Zhou Fengchen asked curiously, "Then why prepare a rooster and food and wine? Is it to pay homage to Heaven and Earth?"

"Screw you!" Monk Yuanzhi said, "We're a bit hungry since we haven't had a midnight snack. Let's have a couple of drinks and see how the chopsticks stand up. As for that rooster, we can use it if we need it later, otherwise we can take it with us and slaughter it for hot pot tomorrow."

Zhou Fengchen was filled with respect, clasped his hands in a fist and said, "Impressive! Impressive! Brother Yuanzhi, please teach me more in the future!"

Monk Yuanzhi awkwardly clasped his hands in a fist and said modestly, "Oh! You're too kind, my brother. Let's strive together! Let's strive together!"

Just then, the family came out and said they were all ready.

Monk Yuanzhi and Zhou Fengchen nodded and went into the room. Sure enough, there was a table with a rooster tied to its legs. On the table were four small dishes and a bottle of wine, but there were no chopsticks.

Monk Yuanzhi glanced at the old man, who pointed to the chopstick holder beside him and said with a forced smile, "Why don't you... take a look yourselves?"

Zhou Fengchen was not convinced, so he picked up two pairs of chopsticks, slammed them on the table, and everyone in the room stared at the chopsticks.

The two pairs of chopsticks slowly stood up without any support, completely exceeding normal physical changes.

Zhou Fengchen subconsciously reached out and tried to bend it, feeling as if something was taut and elastic. When he let go, it stood upright again.

"Ha!" He sneered and formed a hand seal.

Monk Yuanzhi immediately patted him on the shoulder and whispered, "Brother, don't rush! That thing is probably nearby. Let's eat first and then talk about it. Don't waste the food."

He solemnly recited, "This humble monk Yuanzhi respects Heaven and Earth!" and tore off a duck leg.

Zhou Fengchen chuckled dryly, then followed suit, muttering, "This humble Taoist offers scallions to the gods and spirits!" as he tore off another duck leg.

The two of them simply grabbed food with their hands, taking a sip of wine and a bite of food. Before long, the entire table of food and wine was gone.

The family of five sat blankly to the side, completely bewildered.

Just then, the clock on the wall struck midnight, and the ringing sound filled the entire room, startling the family of five.

"Get to work!"

Monk Yuanzhi greeted them, wiped his mouth, clasped his hands together, and said to the chopsticks, "Chopsticks, stand upright and ask about your business. May I ask what grievances you have? Are you the old lady of our clan?"

The two pairs of chopsticks slammed onto the table with a "thud," then stood upright again.

"Are you the patriarch of the same family?"

The chopsticks fell over again, then stood upright.

"Are you a member of the same clan?"

The chopsticks didn't move at all this time.

Zhou Fengchen scratched his head as he watched, while a family of five who had gathered around stared wide-eyed in astonishment.

Actually, this is just a little trick of the monk Yuanzhi. There must be something fishy about the upright shape of the coin. In folk tradition, it usually means that a deceased family member is thinking about something or has something to ask for. If you ask its identity, it will respond. It doesn't matter who asks.

"Excellent! Excellent!" Monk Yuanzhi said confidently, taking out a piece of yellow paper from his pocket and laying it flat on the table. He said, "Daughter of the Li family, if you have any requests, please leave a note, and this humble monk will fulfill them. Please do not disturb your family!"

He took two steps back, and a group of people around him followed suit.

After waiting for five seconds, a line of text slowly appeared on the paper.

The five members of the Li family stared wide-eyed, their breaths trembling.

He wrote for a few seconds and then stopped.

The old man was anxious and rushed ahead to look at the letter, only to be dumbfounded.

Monk Yuanzhi and Zhou Fengchen exchanged a glance, wondering what kind of extraordinary thing it was. They went forward to take a look, and then stared at each other in disbelief.

The letter was covered with a row of circles, a jumbled mess, and it was impossible to understand what it was trying to say.

"Two masters!" the old man asked, choking back tears. "What did my daughter say?"

Monk Yuanzhi scratched his head and asked, "Can your daughter read?"

The old man paused for a moment, then said, "You can read. You graduated from university."

Monk Yuanzhi coughed and said, "Wait a moment, let's discuss this."

He quickly pulled Zhou Fengchen aside and whispered, "What the hell did you write?"

Zhou Fengchen was also a bit confused. "How am I supposed to know?"

Monk Yuanzhi's face twitched a few times, and he said dejectedly, "Damn it, what bad luck! I thought it would be easy, but now I'm in trouble."

Zhou Fengchen asked, "What's wrong?"

Monk Yuanzhi said, "She won't reveal her purpose, and her handwriting is a mess. Either she's playing a trick on us, or there's another reason."

Zhou Fengchen frowned and said, "Why don't we catch them first and then talk about it?"

Monk Yuanzhi smiled wryly and said, "We're here to solve the problem, not to arrest her. With her skill in playing with chopsticks, I could easily subdue her."

Zhou Fengchen asked, "Then what should we do?"

Monk Yuanzhi gritted his teeth, "Let's ask her to come out and ask her face to face! Will you do it, or should I?"

"Come on, come on!"

"Alright!" Monk Yuanzhi raised his head, his face now solemn. He chanted a Buddhist prayer and said to the family, "You must remain hidden and not make a sound no matter what happens. We will ask your daughter to show herself."

"what?"

Seeing a loved one who had been dead for several years was both terrifying and somewhat anticipated. The old man and his family were startled and quickly hid behind the sofa.