Case File Compendium

Chapter 158 Unspeakable Chapter Language

Xie Qingcheng didn't know how he fell asleep.

If it was before, his heart was so chaotic, and the things he experienced were so chaotic, he would never be able to fall asleep anyway.

But his health was deteriorating, and he just had RN-13 treatment, which was a thousand times more painful than chemotherapy, and he was really weak. After calming down on the sofa for a while, he really felt tired.

He didn't want to sleep, he felt that he really needed to calm down, and think about the reason for the increasingly obvious inner tremor when he faced He Yu.

He looked at He Yu's closed door.

He was outside the door, He Yu was inside, and the door was not opened...

The more Xie Qingcheng thought about it, the more he couldn't understand it. He thought about what happened just now, especially He Yu's suppressed sobs at the end, and his heart became more and more uncomfortable.

In the end, he scolded himself in a low voice, and fell back on the sofa dejectedly, his eyes staring at the blank ceiling, gradually becoming distracted.

Tired and in pain, Xie Qingcheng finally fell asleep and had a dream.

He dreamed that he was trapped in a tattered stuffed bear, standing in front of the Ferris wheel in the amusement park, as if waiting for someone.

He didn't know who he was waiting for, he just stood awkwardly and dilapidatedly, holding a handful of hydrogen balloons from the amusement park in his hand.

The Ferris wheel was slowly turning, and the neon lights were changing. After the ride, the tourists walked down talking and laughing. No one paid attention to the corner where he was standing.

Tourists are in groups.

They laughed so happily and contentedly that Ragbear and his toy balloon were superfluous to them.Therefore they cannot see him.

After a while, Xie Qingcheng realized that he seemed to be waiting for someone who needed him and wanted to take the balloon from him.

But he seemed to be under some kind of magic, he couldn't speak, and he couldn't treat each other with his true face, so he could only stand like this, waiting...waiting...

A couple came down from the dreamlike sound of playground music, and Xie Qingcheng suddenly realized that they were his own parents, and he wanted to move his body and walk over.

But his father beckoned and took a white horse carriage from Paradise, Zhou Muying went with him, and the figures of the two were gradually lost by the white horse.

Xie Qingcheng stopped in a daze.

He knew that they had already left, and there was no turning back now.

The second person to get off the ferris wheel was Qin Ciyan.

Lao Qin was alone, wearing the white coat he had worn all his life, looking around with a smile on his face. Xie Qingcheng wanted to stop him, but a child suddenly ran from a distance—a six or seven-year-old boy holding a Cone, he raised his head and yelled something to Lao Qin, but Xie Qingcheng couldn't hear him.

But he already knew who the kid was.

Lao Qin stretched out his hand and held the palm of the little boy. The man and the boy gradually moved away in the colorful lights of the paradise, and they looked very happy.

It is happiness that I have never had before.

Only Xie Qingcheng stayed where he was.

It was already dark.

The third person who came down was Xie Xue. Xie Xue jumped up and down. When she ran from a distance to approach, her figure also changed from a five or six-year-old girl to her current appearance.

When Xie Xue passed him, she was stunned for a moment, she stared at the rag doll, as if she thought he looked familiar.After a few seconds, she walked up to him, laughed, and was about to speak—

In the distance, someone suddenly called her name.

Xie Qingcheng couldn't see that person's appearance clearly, but he knew that it was a man, the one that Xie Xue would eventually spend the rest of his life with.

When Xie Xue heard that person's voice, she turned her head and thought about it. After all, she was no longer a child. Whether it was a doll or a colorful balloon, it should no longer belong to her.

So she smiled at him one last time, waved to her childhood favorite bear puppet, stepped on the small white high heels, and briskly walked towards her bright future.

God, it's totally dark.

On the Ferris wheel, many people came down one after another.

There is Chen Man, there is Aunt Li, there is Li Ruoqiu... But they all have their own direction to go, no one... No one, no one, needs a hug from a broken bear, no one, needs a tight hug from a broken bear Clenched colorful balloons in hand.

The amusement park was about to close, and everyone left one after another.

He stood alone in the waning mood, blinking slowly in the bear doll, he gradually closed his eyes, and gradually let go of his hands, so that those balloons that could no longer entertain anyone fluttered back to the sky...

however--

"Thank you doctor."

"Thank you doctor."

He heard someone calling him.

He opened his eyes vaguely, but there was no one in his field of vision.

"Look at me, I'm here."

He lowered his head and saw a neatly groomed and beautiful child, about seven or eight years old, looking up at him.

That was actually the first time he saw He Yu...

"Doctor Xie, why don't you go home?"

"..." He couldn't answer, he was in the puppet, in the magic.

And even if he could answer, what should he say?

He has no home.

"By the way, Doctor Xie..." Xiao Heyu stretched out his hand, and he held up a small noodle man in the shape of a dragon, "This is something I made at the playground today...for you..."

He put the little dragon mask figure in the pocket of Xie Qingcheng's doll costume.

The child laughed: "Can you praise me?"

"Can you give me a hug?"

"..."

can you give me a hug...

That seemed to be what he had heard He Yu say countless times.

Sad, impulsive, coquettish, earnest, pleading, desperate——

He Yu's voice.

Tell him over and over again.

Here is a lonely child, begging stubbornly for a little response from him.

can you give me a hugXie Qingcheng?

Just like when I hugged you.

The child has been waiting, waiting...

But Xie Qingcheng couldn't move, Xie Qingcheng was inside the bear puppet, he could neither speak nor bend down to give him any reaction.

He Yu looked into his eyes, and slowly changed from anticipation to bewilderment, from bewilderment to confusion, from confusion to disappointment...

He just looked at Xie Qingcheng silently and disappointedly.

Then—his body gradually became transparent—he also—he also disappeared.

He's going to disappear too...

Xie Qingcheng suddenly felt very uncomfortable. In the dream, he tried his best to break free from the shackles of magic. He wanted to give him the colored ball in his hand, and he wanted to ask him, can you see me?do you know i'm in thereHe wanted to reach out—

Suddenly.

The surroundings seemed to suddenly become white, the lanterns, the Ferris wheel, the brick and stone streets parading with floats, everything faded, and it became a scene like a colored pencil painting.

Xie Qingcheng opened his eyes wide.

Someone hugged him from behind.

He didn't look back, but his heart had gone from being calm to speeding up, catching up with his body's reaction. There was a huge tremor in his chest, and he could feel the familiar body temperature and smell...

The young He Yu disappeared before his eyes, and the grown-up He Yu embraced him behind him.

Xie Qingcheng could feel his hot tears streaming down and falling on her shoulders... The tattered puppet bear was hugged tightly by the tall and handsome young man, He Yu wept and said softly: "I know you are here Inside. You don't go."

"I also need a Muppet Bear."

"I still want the colored ball in your hand..."

"Xie Qingcheng, give me your balloons and dolls. OK?"

"You...you turn around and give me a hug, okay..."

That moment.

At that moment, Xie Qingcheng's heart seemed to have received the heaviest and heaviest impact. The impact destroyed the magic that bound him and broke the shackles that prevented him from moving himself.

The broken bear turned around clumsily, and stared at him silently for a long time with eyes like chocolate beans——

Then it stretched out its dilapidated arm that no one needs to rely on anymore, and slowly... slowly lifted it up... Finally, it hugged the young man standing in front of him wiping his tears...

"do not Cry."

The hoarse voice was finally unsealed from the puppet, and with difficulty, it flowed out from his voice that had been unable to speak for a long time.

"Don't cry, He Yu..."

"Do not cry……"

Withered lips murmured, eyelids rolled - Xie Qingcheng suddenly woke up from the dream.

His eyes are still loose, and the aftertaste of the dream has not disappeared.

He raised his hand, trembling, and lightly touched his eyelids.

he is...

What did you dream about?

The earthquake in my heart continued, spreading to my limbs, and even my fingertips couldn't calm down.

He wiped his eyes in disbelief—hot and humid.

There were really tears.

"..." Xie Qing was lying on the sofa in a daze, his chest heaving and rising more quickly than usual, he still had those neon lights in his eyes, and the ethereal singing of the playground seemed to still be in his ears.

He didn't want to believe what he dreamed, didn't want to believe the response and vulnerability in his dream.

He was even more unwilling to believe the feelings he showed at that moment...

He really responded to He Yu.

He slumped on the sofa in a daze, without any strength in his body, his Adam's apple rolled occasionally, his eyes were wide open, thinking about all this.

Thinking of the last hug in the dream, my heart was still trembling.

It took Xie Qingcheng a long time to calm down his emotions. He wiped off the wetness at the end of his eyes, raised his hand and looked at his watch - it was already past two o'clock in the morning, I wonder if He Yu has left?

He turned to look at the study door, which was still closed.

Xie Qingcheng calmed down again, got up, and just walked to the door of the study and was about to knock on the door to enter, when he heard the kitchen door open——He Yu was in the kitchen.

"Are you awake?" He Yu seemed to be still embarrassed by what happened to the two of them before going to bed. For a while, he didn't want to look directly at Xie Qingcheng, but folded his hands to cover up a cough, and whispered, "Well, I cooked supper, you haven't eaten at night, have you? I wanted to wake you up later. It will be ready soon... You have been waiting for me for 5 minutes."

Although He Yu didn't want Xie Qingcheng to enter the kitchen and wanted to serve the dishes directly, Xie Qingcheng went in anyway.

A casserole was simmering on a small fire on the stove, gurgling and steaming, and there was a smell that was by no means unfamiliar to the old Shanghainese.

Xie Qingcheng walked over and saw He Yu's cell phone still in front of the stove.

The young master is not very good at cooking, so he sold it after learning from the recipes on the Internet.The title of the recipe is also displayed on the screen, the title is very clichéd and straightforward——

Make a pot of soup for your darling.

Xie Qingcheng looked away from the title, as if avoiding something.

He took an insulated wet towel and lifted the lid of the casserole, and the heat inside was steaming out, blurring his resolute face.

The stew in the pot is really pickled and delicious.

Xie Qingcheng likes to eat this dish very much, Aunt Li knows how to make it, and he himself can do it too, but it is still not as good as his mother's.

Pickled Duxian is a typical southern dish, which requires ingredients such as young bamboo shoots, ham ribs and thousands of knots, but cooking this dish also requires an invisible ingredient, that is patience.

Pickled Du fresh Du is derived from the gurgling sound of the soup head when the fire is simmering slowly.During the long and patient stewing process, the tenderness of the bamboo shoots, the freshness of the ham, and the freshness of the ribs all turned into the essence of the pot, and they were cooked thoroughly into the thousand knots of Bona's flavors.

With such a thick skin, He Yu couldn't bear it now, and he wanted to rush Xie Qingcheng out again: "Don't stand here, I won't be able to perform well if you stand here, you, you go out first."

"........."

-

"Don't stand in the kitchen, distract me, get out." Zhou Muying said the same to Xie Qingcheng before.

He Yu is actually the same as her in this respect.

Xie Qingcheng wanted to say something, but in the end he didn't say anything, and he went out.

While he was sitting in the living room waiting, he kept thinking about his dream and everything that had happened before.

He knew that He Yu had dug out a heart and wanted to give it to himself.

He had never seen such a passionate love before, so at first he thought it was just a teenage obsession.Not really.

He is like a king who doesn't recognize He Shibi, and He Yu is a Huaibi man who has been wronged by him.He Yu proved his heart is true time and time again, he said to Xie Qingcheng, you are irreplaceable, if you think it is wrong for me to love you, I can be wrong for the rest of my life, until the day I die, And it will prove that I am right.

He said, every day I live, I will be with you, every hour, every minute, every second.I love you, I will protect you, I will be with you.

Xie Qingcheng is not a heart of stone, and it is a lie to say that he has not been touched.But what made him unable to break free the most was He Yu's need for him.

Xie Qingcheng is a machismo after all, what he does most often, what he is most used to doing, is to take care of others.As if that was the meaning of his existence.

Xie Qingcheng thought carefully, if one day he was gone, how would everyone around them live?

He knew that Aunt Li, Chen Man, Xie Xue...they would be very sad, but he also believed that they could support each other and gradually come out of that sadness.

There are many bridges between them and the society. It is painful to lose this one, but it will not be impossible.

Then he thought of He Yu.

If he was gone, would He Yu still obediently cook soup in the kitchen?Will he still cook a meal seriously with a recipe and a cluster of flames?

If he is gone, will He Yu find someone to talk to, work hard to see a doctor, restrain himself as much as possible, not to be swallowed by demons, and he will follow another person, talk to him about the trivial things that happened today, and then Seeking a hug from that person?

Xie Qingcheng knew that it was difficult.

He Yu was too stubborn.

He can bleed, he can burn everything, he can fall into madness, but he doesn't know how to turn back.

Even if he knows that a road is a dead end and is dark, as long as he steps on it, he will keep walking.

Xie Qingcheng closed his eyes.

He didn't expect that in the end, the remaining person who made him unable to predict his future life, and the person who made him worry the most, would be He Yu.

"It's ready, try it!"

He Yu came out from the kitchen, took a big steaming bowl, and put it in front of Xie Qingcheng.

"I'm very smart, the taste should be good."

Xie Qingcheng took a look, it was not pickled fresh.

It was a bowl of noodles. The soup was milky white and mellow, and the noodles were smooth and delicate. On it was green seaweed that had been scalded in hot water. There was a golden soft-boiled egg lying on it, and fried shiitake mushrooms full of fragrant minced meat. The toppings are covered on the soup surface, and finally a few thousand knots of umami are boiled on the top, and a handful of white sesame seeds are sprinkled on it.

The essence of Yanduxian lies in the soup and thousands of knots, because the umami taste of bamboo shoots, ham and meat has been fully given to them.

Xie Qingcheng looked at this bowl of noodles made with salted fresh soup, as if He Yu had exhausted all his enthusiasm, love, and kindness, and then eagerly held it in front of him.He knew something inside him was breaking down.

"He Yu."

The boy raised his almond eyes: "Huh?"

"..."

Xie Qingcheng found himself wanting to apologize for his cruelty to him before.

He was so angry with him for no reason, and what he gave him back a few hours later was a pot of warm soup...

Xie Qingcheng felt extremely uncomfortable, he really wanted to reach out and give this lonely dragon a hug.

Just like in a dream, He Yu hugged him who was deeply trapped in the worn-out puppet bear.

But in the end, he still endured the slight trembling of his fingertips and didn't do that.

If a bridge is going to come down eventually, it shouldn't be the way teenagers get used to it.

Xie Qingcheng was still very rational in the end, and looked away restrainedly.

"You can eat a little too."

"It's fine if I eat meat, I like meat."

"..." Who doesn't know that the marinated meat has already boiled all the essence into the soup, and there is no taste left?

But He Yu, who is picky about food more than anything else, really scooped up some meat and bones, sat opposite Xie Qingcheng and gnawed.

canine.

Xie Qingcheng thought for a long time, finally made up his mind, and said: "...He Yu. Come to my place on weekends, and I will make you what you want to eat. Then..."

Before he finished the rest of the sentence, He Yu's joy and frustration overflowed in an instant: "Is it the weekend?...I'm going to participate in the sports meeting on the weekend, and the school reported it to me."

Xie Qingcheng thought for a while: "Then let's play well. Let's talk about it next time."

"Then will you come to see me play?"

"..."

"can you?"

"I have classes in the morning on weekends, I will try my best."

As Xie Qingcheng spoke, he seemed to feel that the boy's eyes were too hot, so he lowered his eyes and ate noodles.

The boy cheered up again.

And at that moment, Xie Qingcheng felt such pain in his heart...

He finally knew that he also cared about He Yu that much, but so what?

His lifespan is short, if he can't let go of the warmth He Yu gave him, if they continue like this, then in the end he will pass away. Although he enjoyed all the love of the young man, but only left him with long sorrow, that would be too much. Selfish and irresponsible.

The long-term pain is worse than the short-term pain. It has been delayed for so long. It turns out that it is because he has him in his heart, which is hard to get rid of...

However, now is also the time, it is time to completely break the heart——

It's time for him to put down the kid who wanted to cuddle the teddy bear.